Okay, so I bought a book that is designed to help writers get better at telling their stories. I’ve actually bought a few, but this one has piqued my interest and seems to be helping. I have been reading it and doing the exercises in order to improve – the only thing is, I don’t have anyone to tell me whether or not there is any improvement. So, I decided to put some of the exercises up here and ask you guys to help me out. You can look at some of my other posts to compare. Well, as I think about it, there is not much of my fiction writing on here to use – so, I will post some of that in this post. I write from my heart and whatever is on my mind at the time – sometimes I hear other “characters” trying to get out onto the page, so I write them as well.
Today’s excerpt is from a book that I am currently working on, it does not have a title yet, but here goes:
“When I left, you didn’t cry, you didn’t even care! Why should I give a fuck now?!?” Greg said. “Tell me Lena, why should I even give a damn about these tears or drama right now?”
Lena stood in the rain, soaked, crying and pleading with the love of her life. “Because you see me, Love… you really see me. I’m standing here in the rain, pouring my heart out, showing you what I’ve never shown to any man in my life – and you see me! You know me, you know on the regular, I shut ‘em down, shut ‘em out and shut ‘em up! I know I messed up, but I truly gave you all I got!”
Greg thought, ‘She is not the Diva right now – she is not the Queen of the universe that she always portrays – she is just MaLena Joann Harris. He knew that he could quite possibly be the only person on Earth that knew just who that was. He knew her dreams, fears, goals, and issues. Her own mama couldn’t even make that claim since Lena left at fifteen destined to do her own thang. He felt for her, he loved her, but there was no way he could take her back now. She had played him to the left for the last time. He also knew that if he let her go like this – it would just make her worse. It would completely crush the tiny bit of faith in love that they both had left. But, why should he care about that anymore? It wouldn’t do any good to try to explain this to her now, she wouldn’t even hear him. The only real heartache that she’d ever known had been six months before they got together. Now, two and a half years later, she really had no idea that it was still affecting her. He believed that she did love him, but she still had the mentality of a heartbroken teenager, even though she was now almost thirty. Greg had tried so hard to pour enough love into her to remedy the pain, but it never seemed to be enough. What else could he do? He had been so in love with her that he dealt with the emotional roller coaster; he was there for the breakdowns; he accepted the drama with her and the ex – and others – this was it, ENOUGH! He had felt so lucky to be with her, but it wasn’t like he was a bad catch either! When would she realize that?
Greg really couldn’t stand to see her like that, so he hugged her, took her home, and put her to bed. She fell asleep right after a hot shower. No words were spoken between them. Greg tucked her in and went to the guest room. He couldn’t sleep at all – he just lay there thinking. He thought of the day he met her. She was so damned SEXY! She was walking though the mall with two other girls and she stood out from them like a diamond in a pile of coal. They were all laughing about something when she stopped and said, “Only the best for Miss MaLena.” He was enraptured immediately. Greg followed and watched for a little while, when the ladies separated for a moment. He noticed that she was looking for something, so he walked over and asked, “Can I help you find it, Miss MaLena?”
She looked up at him and said, “Find what?”
He answered, “True Love, Miss MaLena.”
She laughed. “That’s cute, lame, but cute. And you would be…?”
“Greg Walker, at your service, for as long as you’d like.”
From that moment, they seemed to be inseparable. He fell – hard and quick.
So, now you have a preview of my writing style, later I will begin to post the exercises and you can comment to let me know if it is helping. Thank you all in advance.